(no subject)

[primroseburrows]

I was in my car (surprise!) a few minutes ago, and an spot comes on the radio for some Women's wellness place, talking about laser cosmetic surgery to fix all sorts of "defects". Now that's all well and good, I have nothing against it at all. The problem was the song they used to in the ad--Christina Aguilera's Beautiful. Um, wait a minute.

Isn't the whole point of that song that we're all beautiful just the way we are? Somebody in Advertising needs to Get a Clue.


In other news,

The piano has been drinking, my necktie is asleep
And the combo went back to New York, the jukebox has to take a leak
And the carpet needs a haircut, and the spotlight looks like a prison break
And the telephone's out of cigarettes, and the balcony is on the make
And the piano has been drinking, the piano has been drinking...

And the menus are all freezing, and the light man's blind in one eye
And he can't see out of the other
And the piano-tuner's got a hearing aid, and he showed up with his mother
And the piano has been drinking, the piano has been drinking
As the bouncer is a Sumo wrestler cream-puff casper milktoast
And the owner is a mental midget with the I.Q. of a fence post
'Cause the piano has been drinking, the piano has been drinking...

And you can't find your waitress with a Geiger counter
And she hates you and your friends and you just can't get served without her
And the box-office is drooling, and the bar stools are on fire
And the newspapers were fooling, and the ash-trays have retired
'Cause the piano has been drinking, the piano has been drinking
The piano has been drinking, not me, not me, not me, not me, not me

This is one of the best uses of wordplay in a song, ever. And it's Tom Waits and his gravelly voice. *loves*