(no subject)
Nov. 12th, 2003 11:25 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
primroseburrowsHmm. Apparently the Catholic Bishops are trying to explain the Church's position on gay marriage.
Archbishop Sean O'Malley has this to say: "We have failed to perhaps articulate our doctrine clear enough," he said. "We want homosexuals to be part of the community, but we can't change the Ten Commandments for them."
Excuse me for being obtuse, Your Grace (is it Your Grace?), but how do the Ten Commandments relate to gay marriage?
Let's take a look:
I. Thou shalt have no other gods before me. Nope, no sign of taboo here.
II. Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image. Still nope.
III. Thou shalt not take the name of the LORD thy God in vain. I could go into what this means and what it doesn't, but as for gay marriage, it's not applicable. Gay people aren't any more likely to take the Lord's name in vain than straight or bisexual people.
IV. Remember the sabbath day, to keep it holy. I personally know gay couples who attend church faithfully, every Sunday.
V. Honour thy father and thy mother. Gay people can do this even if they're married to each other. They can visit the inlaws, have dinner, watch a little telly. You know, just like everyone else.
VI. Thou shalt not kill. Studies show that married people live longer than single people. So gay marriage would increase the whole People Not Dying stats.
VII. Thou shalt not commit adultery. Now here's the problem. Apparently, Archbishop O'Malley says that this commandment is the one that forbids gay marriage. Well, the dictionary says otherwise. Adultery is a sexual relationship where at least one party is married to someone else. And even if you take the other popular definition, that adultery is sex outside of marriage, the solution is simple. Allow gay couples to marry, et voila! End of problem.
VIII. Thou shalt not steal. Nope. N/A
IX. Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbour. I would think that if a couple wants to get married, they wouldn't want to lie and say they didn't. So, nope.
X. Thou shalt not covet any thing that is thy neighbour's. And, nope.
So you see, Your Grace, gay couples marrying isn't contradictory to the Ten Commandments at all. Yeah, I know, other places in your holy book are greyer, but. We're talking commandments here, 'cause you brought it up. So you don't have to have all these discussions after all. I just solved your problem.
You have a nice day, y'hear? Call me if you need anything else, like maybe help with that pesky rule that says women can't be priests.
Archbishop Sean O'Malley has this to say: "We have failed to perhaps articulate our doctrine clear enough," he said. "We want homosexuals to be part of the community, but we can't change the Ten Commandments for them."
Excuse me for being obtuse, Your Grace (is it Your Grace?), but how do the Ten Commandments relate to gay marriage?
Let's take a look:
I. Thou shalt have no other gods before me. Nope, no sign of taboo here.
II. Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image. Still nope.
III. Thou shalt not take the name of the LORD thy God in vain. I could go into what this means and what it doesn't, but as for gay marriage, it's not applicable. Gay people aren't any more likely to take the Lord's name in vain than straight or bisexual people.
IV. Remember the sabbath day, to keep it holy. I personally know gay couples who attend church faithfully, every Sunday.
V. Honour thy father and thy mother. Gay people can do this even if they're married to each other. They can visit the inlaws, have dinner, watch a little telly. You know, just like everyone else.
VI. Thou shalt not kill. Studies show that married people live longer than single people. So gay marriage would increase the whole People Not Dying stats.
VII. Thou shalt not commit adultery. Now here's the problem. Apparently, Archbishop O'Malley says that this commandment is the one that forbids gay marriage. Well, the dictionary says otherwise. Adultery is a sexual relationship where at least one party is married to someone else. And even if you take the other popular definition, that adultery is sex outside of marriage, the solution is simple. Allow gay couples to marry, et voila! End of problem.
VIII. Thou shalt not steal. Nope. N/A
IX. Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbour. I would think that if a couple wants to get married, they wouldn't want to lie and say they didn't. So, nope.
X. Thou shalt not covet any thing that is thy neighbour's. And, nope.
So you see, Your Grace, gay couples marrying isn't contradictory to the Ten Commandments at all. Yeah, I know, other places in your holy book are greyer, but. We're talking commandments here, 'cause you brought it up. So you don't have to have all these discussions after all. I just solved your problem.
You have a nice day, y'hear? Call me if you need anything else, like maybe help with that pesky rule that says women can't be priests.
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(no subject)
Date: 2003-11-13 11:02 pm (UTC)I don't think they use the term "Your Grace" in Hebrew--the closest I can think of is "Adoni"--literally, my master. And the only word I know for rear end is "toosie" (lit. "tushy"), which is from my once-a-week volunteering in a day care. I don't think it would have quite the same effect, do you?
(no subject)
Date: 2003-11-14 05:37 am (UTC)That'll do.